Astros Fans Enter the George Costanza Zone

In one of my all-time favorite episodes of Seinfeld, a suicide jumper lands on George’s car when he is parked at a hospital.  The car is completely ruined, leaving Mr. Costanza with quite the predicament.  One of the one hand, it’s really not fair that his car is totaled and that he should have to pay for it, but on the other hand, a much worse event occurred (the death of a human being) so if he says anything, he is bound to be seen as a horrible human being, debunk of all emotion and feeling.  In the end, George speaks up to the hospital manager and gets the boot.  Right when I heard about what Bud Selig was doing with the Astros-Cubs series, I knew that the Astros fans could relate to George.

First of all, let’s state the obvious: playing this series in Milwaukee is nothing even close to resembling a home series for the Astros.  The city is a second home for Cubs fans.  In the first game of the series, where Zambrano threw a no-hitter, apparently 2/3 of the stadium was full and there was not an Astros fan in sight.  How’s that for a home game in the thick of a playoff race?  Clearly Major League Baseball looks like idiots here.  I mean, how could Bud Selig not have a contingency plan for hurricanes after Katrina?  This is what is the most shocking detail about this whole event.  When something bad happens, you make adjustments so that you never have the same problem again.  When you fall to your death in the original “Mario Brothers” when the bridge at your feet gives away, you run faster the next time you are on it.  You obviously have to recognize that there could potentially be a problem so why not have a plan in place.  If these teams can’t play they will play in the closest location to the home team possible.  Boom, there you have it.  I just employed the problem solving skills of a ten year old.  Well done Bud!

Astros fans can relate to a Mr. George Costanza

So there you are Astros fans, right in George Costanza’s shoes.  You can’t whine and complain because, after all, it’s a baseball game and there were real lives that were affected by Hurricane Ike.  Families were displaced and you are concerned about the fairness in a baseball game.  You are made out to be terrible people if you complain.  Well I understand your pain Astros fans.  Look, is baseball as important as human life?  Obviously not.  But if Major League Baseball cares about putting a fair product on the field, then they need to think about what is most fair.  They are going to get a free pass here because “it’s just baseball” but the fact is they screwed up big time and if the Astros end up missing the postseason by a single game, there needs to be repurcussions.  I’m tired of Bud Selig running the MLB like he is Stalin and the public is living in Siberia.  So I’m sory Astros fans.  I really am.  Looks like you just got Bud Seliged (note-other victims of his include every single baseball fan past, present, or future…seriously, the man is a tyrant).

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Tags: Bud Selig, Carlos Zambrano, Chicago Cubs, George Costanza, Houston Astros, Mario Brothers, Miller Park, Milwaukee, no-hitter, Seinfeld, Stalin

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